It's Not Your Problem

[INTERNAL MEMO]

Team,

I wanted to share this after a conversation I had earlier this week I felt was a good reminder for everyone here…

Not every problem is yours to solve as a leader.

Many leaders are natural problem-solvers. We’re decisive, capable, and used to being the person others come to. Over time, that can quietly turn into a sense of obligation to fix everything our team brings us.

It’s easy to justify this because people’s personal stress, confusion, or frustration often does impact performance. We care about our people. We want them to succeed. And when something affects results, it feels like our job to step in.

But here’s the hard truth: Owning every problem for your team eventually harms both you and them.

Yes - leaders should set boundaries and enforce scope.
Yes - we should redirect issues that belong elsewhere.
Yes - we should support, coach, and give clear feedback.

Those things are in our control.

What isn’t in our control is whether someone takes responsibility for what’s theirs.

If you’ve provided clarity, reasonable options, and support and what comes back is defensiveness, excuses, or responsibility being pushed back onto you or away from both of you - that’s no longer a leadership gap.

Some people drain energy not because they’re struggling, but because they refuse ownership. When every solution is met with a reason it won’t work or reminders of failed attempts the issue isn’t the solution - it’s the person’s unwillingness to engage.

This is where leadership requires restraint, not effort.

Every situation has nuance, and discernment matters. But sometimes the most honest conclusion is this: You cannot help someone who won’t participate in helping themselves.

Good leadership isn’t solving every problem. It’s knowing which ones to hold and which ones to give back so you can focus on those who take full ownership.