[INTERNAL MEMO]
Fix yourself first
Hey team!
I want to share something that happened when I was running my first company.
We had just started doing weekly team meetings. Every time I showed up on these calls, I'd look at my screen and think the same thing:
"Man, what is this?"
Everyone was dressed in sweatpants, looked like they had just rolled out of bed and honestly it was a group of people looking like disheveled messes :/
It was driving me crazy - we're trying to build a REAL company here, and my team looks like they just rolled out of bed. Embarrassing AF.
Then I looked at myself…
OH...
I was a disheveled mess. Hah.
Here I was, frustrated that my team wasn't showing up professionally, while I was showing up looking the EXACT same way. Frightening…
So I tried something. I didn’t make an announcement. I didn’t create a new policy. I didn’t send a passive-aggressive Slack message about "professional standards."
I just started doing my makeup and wearing a normal nice top to our meetings.
That's it.
And guess what?
Within 3 weeks, every other person on my team had started doing the same.
Zero words spoken but a complete transformation.
Why This Matters
The best leaders understand that it's not about what you say and what you ask people to do.
It's what you demonstrate with your actions.
This truth applies to everything:
Want your team to be punctual? Be early.
Want better communication? Over-communicate.
Want higher standards? Live them first.
Want professional meetings? Look professional.
Your team is watching you. Not listening to you - watching you. And they'll unconsciously mirror whatever standard you set through your behavior.
Standards are caught, not taught.
The problem is, most of us try to manage through words instead of demonstration. We create policies about behaviors we don't model. We set expectations we don't meet. We demand standards we don't uphold.
And then we wonder why nothing changes!!!
So HOW do you actually lead through demonstration?
Look at yourself first. Whatever frustrates you about your team, check if you're doing it too.
Change quietly. Don't announce it. Just f*cking do it.
Be consistent for at least 3 weeks. That's how long it takes for people to notice and mirror new behavior.
Focus on what you control - yourself. You can't force change, but you can demonstrate it.
Here's the uncomfortable truth: Your team's behavior is a mirror of yours.
If you don't like what you see, don't try to fix them.
Fix yourself first.
The rest will follow.
Have a great week 🙏🏼
-Leila
